There she is all by herself waiting for someone so patiently,the anxiousness in her eyes tells the story.The one she is waiting for is very lucky.Waiting to feel the touch, the warmth she'd feel with whomever it is,the comfort it would give her when those arms hold her tight,the childish eyes that would look straight into her eyes which would make herself feel secure,the hands that would clear the hair on her face so gently and the lips that'd kiss her which would make her feel no need to search for heaven.she still waits for him.It seems like she would be waiting all day "just so".
She's beautiful,the thing is that she's out of the ordinary.At a safe distance i keep a silent look at her,every move she makes and every time she walks few step forward and turns back continously,i see her in the cold gloomy day pulling the sleeves of her sweater to keep her hands warm and biting her nails in anxiousness.People are passing by as usual.She sometimes stares at a piece of rock,being still for several minutes and then reality hits her,and it hits her hard.She's out of her la...la...land.
Finally,i see a different side of her.Now she frowns and wonders why has she been waiting for the one that would never come all this time .She tries to walk away of that place but her feet pulls herself back,the agony that is burning her from inside so sweetly that she's unable to tell truth from a lie and reality from a dream.Now she sits there with both her hands on her head.
She's disoriented from inside,not completely though.
It seems like shes not one of those losers who would quit living for something so cheap but the one who would stand back up after falling down and destroy the reason that felled her down.
Something unexpected has happenned.All of a sudden tears roll down her face,the tear falling from her cute big eyes has a whole lot of story, i think .I'm still looking at her from a safe distance.I dont have the courage to go to her and wipe those tears with my hand off the ever glowing face of hers and give her my shoulder for support.There's no one,not a single person to support her.Selfish world,i think.Each person walking by has their own life and a reason to live for so,no one even bothers to give a shit to anyone other than themselves.But look at me........seriously.....of all people im the one with no work,no any reason to live for and im taking notice of each and every step that she takes.
I do have friends and people who act as if they care......they only look at me when i have something to give but there's never my turn to receive.That's life for you,i think. so, i have left all of them and started talking to my own self,that way i wouldnt have to worry that i'd ever be alone and it'll certainly not ask any favours in return.
She wipes her tear and tries to look fresh but i can see her,how much she tries she cannot hide everything behind her MONALISA SMILE,the smile that comes with pain.
Suddenly a current of courage swirls through my veins,they bulk and pop through the auricles and ventricles of my heart and reach my brain,triggering a excitation within me.I dont know what im going to da next,it seems like something's controlling me.I walk towards her and reach near.I try to run a few sentences through my head so that i wouldnt seem dumb infront of her.BUT,she picks herself up and walks away from there,i think destiny is not in my side,as it always is the case,poor me.
I sit down where she was sitting before and just stare at the tears she spilled over the ground.the emotions that she buried down.I stand up and walk away,and guess what?? it starts drizzling.I run to take shelter under a tree and wait for the rain to go away.As i wait,i see "the girl" almost not noticing the rain walking as the rain washes her tears away.It seems like everything else,the cars,buses,and all the streetwalkers have stood still and only she's the one in motion.She stops for a brief moment and comes under the same tree under which i am standing.
Theres no stopping to the rain it seems,so she walks from there too,i look at her going away as far as my sight allows me and after sometime my eyes cannot picture her in my sight.
I'm patiently waiting for the rain to stop.I'm hallucinating now,i'm letting my mind control me,even though its wet i run,not feeling the cold drops of rain in a cold November evening.My mind is jammed,it seems im blank ."The girl",pain,joy,excitement all go away.They vanish like the mythical genie of the lamp.I feel high without any drug and it brings a sense of freedom to me,and it sort of consoles me and i try not to dig deep into my tiny little brain.
Tomorrow is going to be a new day.The sun awaits to shine upon my empty skull and imprint the face of another "QUEEN OF HEARTS" that would drag me to the point i could give all that i have and then drop me dead.
